Loyalty
by Girl-Apart5
Summary: Isshu/Harmoniashipping. N wants to deepen his relationship with Black, but letting go of the chains that tied him to his father is no easy task. Warnings inside


Here's the fic I wrote for Ginny's birthday! Rape, angst, hurt/comfort, abuse, kinkiness, all the usual. Enjoy!

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><p><strong>Black's POV<strong>

"What are you thinking about?" I asked N as I walked over to the couch where he sat staring off into space, wearing a torn expression.

At first N shook his head, but I took a seat next to him and guided his face around until he looked me in the eyes. "Something has been bothering you for days now. Tell me what it is. Please."

We had been living together since N's return a month ago. He had nowhere else to stay, and after I clumsily confessed my feelings for him, he told me that he wanted to be with me. But then not long after that, after each night being woken up by his screaming at nightmares, I heard the truth about his tortured past. As a result of it, N could not understand what this kind of love between humans meant, but beyond my horror, I felt so very happy that in spite of his misconceptions, he was able to earnestly return my every "I love you". But I was still just beginning to see the extent of N's shadows.

After a moment of internal debate, N leaned forward and kissed me very gently. It was only the second time I had been able to feel his soft lips, and my nerve endings seemed to have caught fire.

So caught up in our kiss was I that when N shifted to lay down on the couch, pulling me with him to rest between his long legs, I had no time nor presence of mind to put up any resistence until I was on top of him.

"N?" I nearly squeaked in surprised, trying to sit up; but he quickly wrapped his arms around my back and held me in place.

"I want you." He said even faster than usual, looking away in a more timid gesture than I had thought him capable of.

Speechless, I stared down at him. "..What..?" I had to have misheard.

N met my shocked gaze strongly now. "I want you."

"But.. N.." I can't deny that I have longed for this so much it hurts, but was he really ready? Or had he just picked up on my desire and was only trying to selflessly please me?

Tears welled up in his eyes, and I felt him begin to shake. "You are– I am–" I had never heard him speak so haltingly, even when he told me of all he had endured as a child.

I stroked his cheeks with what I hoped would be a comforting gesture. "It's alright." I reassured him softly. "You don't have to do this."

N shook his head stubbornly. "I want... I am just... I'm scared. Not of you! But I.. can't shake the thought that I shouldn't."

"Shouldn't?"

He pulled me closer. "Shouldn't be with you. Like this. I'm not allowed.. I wasn't allowed.. To touch or be touched by anyone other than Father. And the consequences..."

"N..." I bit my lip. "Ghetsis is gone. Long gone. He can't manipulate you anymore."

"I know! I know... But it's not easy.. forgetting a life's worth of.. training."

"I understand." As I made to get up, N tightened his arms and pressed his face against my shoulder.

"No.. I want to feel you. Your skin, and your warmth. I want to be made _yours_."

Feeling as though my heart was breaking for him yet again, I nodded slowly. "If you ever want me to stop.."

"I know." A bit of the sadness on his face lightened, and he lifted his head to kiss me. With as much restraint as I could manage, I returned the gesture gently and slowly. Shifting myself completely onto the couch, my tongue slipping between his lips and I tasted his sweetness.

I moaned as N pulled his legs up, bringing our clothed erections even closer together. Unable to help myself, I began to rock my hips against him, and gasped when he whimpered and moved with me.

Breaking off our kiss, I looked down at him as our hips rolled, like a rehearsal for what was to come. Though my blood felt replaced with molten lava, and despite the agonizing ache pounding between my legs, I marveled at N's gradually clouding expressing. I could see in his eyes how much he wanted to trust me, how he was silently pleading with me to give him a reason to.

"N," I whispered hoarsely through my pleasure. Did anything else really need to be said? I brushed my lips against his and felt him smile.

His delicate hands ran down my back and grabbed my ass, holding me tight against him as he took over the pace, rocking into me fast and hard. Ecstacy swept through my mind, and I collapsed on top of him, unable to speak over my own moaning. I could hear N, the sounds he himself made as he buried his face in the crook of my neck and wrapped his long body around me, thrusting with a graceful, practiced rhythm.

It was maddening, being this close and yet not close enough. I wanted to feel his skin, to be inside him, but all I had was the heat and motions of his body, and infuriatingly enough, it was about to drive me off the edge I wanted to cling to still longer; but whatever self control I had was thrown out the window. I am a virgin, after all. Were my impassioned cries embarrassing? Thrusting against him so mindlessly, I could not even bother to care how stupid this must look, all that mattered was that it didn't _stop_, and ohhh...

Crying out, I felt my body spasm and release with wave after wave of pleasure before turning me limp with exhaustion. N continued moving, speeding up as he approached the same peak, his gasps and whimpers growing louder. As spent as I was, it was almost torturous to hear him and feel him like this when I could not join him. Not knowing what else to do, I traced the shell of his ear with my tongue before sucking on the soft lobe. To my delight, N screamed my name, his entire body going rigid for a few seconds, and then relaxing completely.

"Black..." N sobbed as I continued to nibble at his ear. "Stop.. O-oh..! I can't.. I can't..!"

I chuckled as he writhed beneath me. "Does that feel good?"

"Mmmnnnn!" N tried to push me away. "W-we're all sticky, and.. Ah! We should.. We should..! Black, _please_, it's too much!"

Unable to keep myself from laughing outright, I pulled back to grin at his flustered expression. "I know, I'm sorry. Come on, let's get out of these clothes." Getting up to find myself rather weak in the knees, I led us into the bedroom where we sat down on the bed we shared and began removing our clothing.

Looking over at N as he tossed his pants onto the pile now on the floor, I noticed he suddenly looked timid and uncertain. Reaching out, I touched his chin. "N? Are you happy?" When he glanced up nervously, I elaborated. "Are you happy being here with me? Like this?"

"Yes." He answered softly, scooting closer to me. "I've never been more happy. ..I love you."

Smiling, I leaned forward to kiss him. "Then do you trust me?"

"I trust you."

"Thank you." As I pulled his lean frame into my arms, I felt the ridges and grooves of scars along his back, but tried to ignore them. Together we lay down and tangled up our legs, content for a moment to grow accustomed to the closeness and the press of bare skin. It was comfortable like that. But eventually my mouth found his again, and as I tasted him, the heat began to rekindle.

Slowly I rolled on top of him, my hands greedy in their exploration of his body. Thankfully N was relaxed, his former apprehension seeming to have faded into a yearning equal to my own, if the passion with which he kissed me was any indication.

My erection was now pressed against his, and for a moment I indulged in rubbing them together as we had before ridding ourselves of all barriers. N sighed into my mouth, his legs falling open eagerly, and I had to tell myself sternly that I could not just thrust inside now. We had to take this slowly and carefully. For his sake, and because I was not exactly confident in my inexperience.

Pulling us apart before we could get distracted again, I reached over to get a tube of lubrication that I had saved just in case this would ever happen. Glancing back at N, I tried not to let his obvious confusion from my actions ruin the mood as I squeezed a large amount of the clear gel into my hand and rubbed until it was warm. Returning to his embrace, I nervously slid my hand between his legs and touched his entrance. Finding only trust in his face, I worked one finger inside him. His eyes shut, and his hands tightened their grip on my shoulders. Then suddenly N pulled me down to his lips and kissed me ravenously. I was surprised, but certainly delighted, and eagerly kissed him back.

Inside he was tight and soft, and soon I had three fingers carefully stretching and stroking the place his feverish pleas had guided me to. N spread kisses across my face, my neck, anywhere he could reach, nibbling lightly and seemingly starving for contact of any kind. It was enough to leave me breathless.

"Black..!" He gasped yet again. "Now! I need you!"

The certainty, the command in his eyes was undeniable. Feeling more anxious and excited than ever in my life, I pulled back my hand and lifted his hips. Then slowly, I pressed into him. I heard myself hiss and groan as N's head fell back with a long, deep sigh. He was so tight, so warm. I could never have imagined it feeling this good. Shuddering as at last I had settled as deep as I could go, I wrapped my arms around him and held us together as close as our bodies would allow.

All the things I wanted to tell him, the vast range of emotions I wanted to express, I couldn't do it. My mind was spinning so fast that anything I could try to say would end up a jumbled mess falling upon deaf ears. N too was beside himself, and we could not allow for much time to adjust before we were moving again. Awkward at first, but then stepping into rhythm, we turned into a writhing mass of flesh and need. Touching, tasting, fucking like the world was about to end. But it meant something. It was healing. N was crying, and not entirely from pleasure, but he begged me for more. I drove into him with every promise, every declaration of what I felt for him, and I know he understood. Nothing else mattered but this.

My angle must have shifted just right, because suddenly N was screaming, fingernails clawing fire across my shoulders. I sank my teeth into the crook of his neck and held on, thrusting as hard as I could, unable to slow down even if he had wanted me to. Though his heels were digging into my lower back and his loud cries rang in my ear, I did not mind. In fact I loved it. I loved all of this. Every time he gasped my name or tightened around me, feeling him writhe and buck against me, it was so perfect. I can't hang on.

Wanting something more, I pulled out of his arms and got up on my knees. Through hazy vision I looked down at his body spread out beneath me, the ecstacy on his face, and forced myself to hold on as I continued moving in and out of him. We were both so close, but at the same time wanting to stay in this moment for as long as possible. N reached out to me, his body shifting up and down with the strength of my thrusts, and I took his hand and kissed it.

The next few moments were a blur of blinding pleasure as once again my muscles convulsed and I let go inside him, just barely managing to stay upright. I don't know which of us came first, but when at last I could see again, we were both spent. Pushing my sweat-soaked hair back from my face, I slowly caught my breath. I wanted nothing more than to curl up with N right there, but we were both pretty messy at this point. Forcing my humming body to cooperate, I began to climb off the bed.

"No!"

Startled, I looked back to see N sitting up, his expression frantic and one hand reaching for me again. As if regretting that action, he flinched back immediately and looked away.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

Fearing that I had somehow ruined everything, I placed my hand on his trembling knee. "N, what's the matter?"

He shook his head furiously, fingers coming up to claw at his scalp as he curled into a ball. "I'm sorry..! Please, forget I said anything..! I.. I..."

Realizing N was starting to have a fit like when he wakes up from particularly bad nightmares, I quickly scooted closer and pulled him into my arms, hoping that I could keep him from shaking apart. "Calm down! Calm down, N! It's ok! I'm not going to be mad. Just tell me what's wrong, please! Oh, N, please don't cry.. Weren't you happy just a moment ago? Wasn't everything alright? Shhh, don't cry..."

The next few minutes were spent with me rocking him in my arms as he shuddered and sobbed, and I honestly worried that his bones would break if he kept it up. I said every comforting thing I could think of, apologizing and begging for his trust. After what seemed like a very long while, he began at last to calm down, and now lay exhausted in my arms.

"Will you tell me now what happened?" I asked gently, laying him down again.

N took in a deep, wavering breath. "..I don't want you to go. Please.. don't leave me here alone."

Shocked, I took his face in my hands and made sure he paid attention as I clarified my actions. "No, N! I was only going to get a cloth to clean us up! I'm not going to just walk out on you!"

One last small sob he was unable to suppress escaped him. "I don't care about that. Stay. Please stay."

I closed my eyes. "Alright. I'm here, N. It's ok." Getting back on the bed, I laid down next to him and let our limbs tangle together as I threw the blankets over us.

"Black.." He began. "I'm sorry about.."

I interjected. "Hush. I don't know what exactly happened, but I'm sure it must come from something very painful. Don't apologize."

"But I ruined our night.."

"You did no such thing. It's ok now."

Feeling his shaking nearly gone, I tilted his face up so I could wipe away the tears, his bright eyes looking at me with that same plea for trustworthiness as before. "How's this?" I asked, tightening my arms around him.

N smiled slightly, his genuine but hesitant smile that so few get to see. "It feels nice."

"Good." I kissed his forehead. "Promise me you won't think about those terrible times. They're over, now."

Humming softly in agreement, N buried his face against my neck. "They're over."

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><p><strong>Many Years Before<strong>

It was another night, and another visit from his father. Another command to put down his toys and come here. Fighting back the need to gag as his mouth was forced down onto the man's cock, trying to do it the way he had been taught. Pulling down his pants and turning around. Willing himself not to beg for mercy and waste his breath. Struggling to believe that this was just another time like every other, even though he felt like he would be ripped in two. An endlessly repeating ritual.

On his elbows and knees, N concentrated on keeping his head up off the rough carpet floor as his father took him from behind, sharply pulling him back into each trust. By this time he had lost the energy and the will to scream or cry, his body numb to the worst of the pain, so in a daze he rode it out like he always did. The harsh grunting and the slapping of flesh, it was the same as every other time. He felt used, like an easily discarded object, inhuman and unloved. An existence meant solely to serve his father.

And that was alright.

At least he was needed. At least, no matter how it felt now, this was still an expression of his father's love. He assumed that he was just too young to understand and trusted Ghetsis's will. If his body could be of such intimate use to the only human he loved, then N could feel happiness through the pain. Although in these moments of excruciating torment, it was hard to remember that this was supposed to be love.

Ghetsis was moving faster now, and N knew he was close. The man had worked himself as deep into his son as he could go, causing even more pain to shoot up his spine, arresting his lungs and churning his stomach. No longer able to hold himself up, N let his forehead rest in his hands, feeling a small pulse of pleasure when the difference in angle caused his father to moan loudly. Knowing that he was doing well was always a comfort.

Soon, soon. It will be over soon. N told himself this feverishly, feeling the cock inside him swell and throb. It would be over and then his job would be done.. But then he would be left alone. He wished that just once, his father would stay with him after he was finished. N never had the breath to ask if he had been good enough.

With a primal growl, Ghetsis bent over as he released into the boy's body, ecstacy washing through him. When the last of his seed had filled his son, he sat back and let him drop to the floor, bleeding and shivering.

As he got up to take his leave, a sound from the prone figure left behind made him glance back.

N was reaching out to him, looking desperate for something he could not give voice to.

"What." Ghetsis asked shortly.

"S..stay..." N panted weakly. "Don't..leave.."

Ghetsis scowled. What a truly backwards child. As amusing as it was to see him still wanting interaction with his abuser, this clingy attitude was undesirable.

Without a word, he turned and left the room with a resolution to not return again for some time.

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><p>N stared at his bedroom door, concerned and apprehensive. It surely must have been more than a week since Ghetsis had last visited him. Longer than usual. And having not seen anyone since then, he did not even know if there was any reason for this long absence.<p>

No. He did know. Last time he had behaved badly. He had upset his father and now he was being punished. It gnawed at him, and he could not concentrate on anything. The moment Ghetsis walks through that door, N would do anything to apologize. There was nothing worse than knowing his father was mad at him.

But there was no sign of the man. Night after night he would not appear. N could not sleep, nor rest. He paced his room, utterly alone. His friends had not been around at all, either. Every day a tray of food was left outside his door, but he never knew when to catch the person leaving it. The isolation was driving him mad, and the bright colours and cheerful atmosphere of his room now seemed to mock him, poking at him as if asking why he wasn't happy. He should be happy. It didn't even hurt to walk anymore, why wasn't he happy.

He couldn't take it anymore. Looking back at his door, N considered leaving. It was rarely ever locked, but he was not allowed any further out than to get his food. Still... If he could find Ghetsis and apologize without needing to be prompted, then perhaps that was what he was expected to do? At the very least he could find answers.

Making up his mind, N strode to the door and threw it open. With a deep, nervous breath, he stepped out into the grand hallway. Which way? He took a left. It felt like the best plan.

Down lavish corridors without a single soul he walked, feeling extremely small. Only on the rarest occasions was he allowed outside his room, and never unattended. It was nerve-wracking, this exposure. The shell of his small, familiar world had been removed, and more than anything he wanted to scamper back to it. But could he even find his way if he tried? All these halls and doorways looked the same.

Rounding the next corner, N jerked to a stop when the man he had ventured out of his only safety to find came into view farther down the hall. Heart leaping into his throat, he darted back behind the wall and then peered out carefully. His father was talking to a young man in Team Plasma garb, too far for him to hear what was being said. As N watched cautiously, an unsettling sensation stirred inside him.

He did not like it. The lack of space between the two people, the predatory smirk that was all too familiar. Why was his father looking at the boy like that? Had he taken him, too? This possibility made a fire ignite in N's gut. Was that true? Did that boy know his father's touch? Were there others?

No one else should serve Ghetsis the way he did. It was something special between them, only them. What did it mean if he was not the only boy to have lain in Ghetsis's bed? Was he not enough? Not _good_ enough? Did he not scream loud enough? Fight hard enough? Was his body no longer entertaining?

Hot tears welled up in N's eyes as Ghetsis rested his hand on the boy's shoulder, and he saw the shudder that traveled through his body. Was that unworthy Plasma grunt feeling the same fear/yearning he always did when Ghetsis touched him? Was he anticipating what might happen next? Wanting and needing the tearing agony of the Sage's love? No one should know that confusing sensation but N. Ghetsis was _his_ father, and his alone.

Unable to take anymore, N turned and ran as far and fast as his weak legs could take him. He felt betrayed, and understood for the first time what his pokemon friends meant when they told him about being replaced and discarded by their trainers.

N's desperate flight came to an abrupt halt when he slammed headlong into someone, nearly crashing back onto the floor were it not for the hands that caught him. Blinking away the tears that just kept coming, N saw an older man, also a grunt, looking down at him with shock and worry.

"Young Master?"

So this man knew who he was? Not many did. And now on top of his distress he felt a wave of shame for being seen by his future subject in such a disgraceful state.

The man knelt down and handed N a handkerchief. "Are you alright? What's the matter?"

N struggled to calm himself and wiped his face quickly. If Ghetsis found out that he had shown such a display to an underling...

No. What did it matter if his father knew or what would happen. If Ghetsis could not even remain loyal to him, his opinion did not deserve a moment's thought. N was the prince, and he could do as he pleased.

Allowing himself to be led into a nearby room and onto a chair, N took several deep breaths and continued telling himself that this was not his fault. If Ghetsis wanted to fuck every man in their organization then so be it, but his hands were no longer worthy of touching their future king. Yes. That was right.

Feeling an almost eerie calm come over him, N wiped away the last of his tears and let out a long breath. Looking up at the grunt, he noticed how the man seemed almost dazzled to be in his presence. Revered as he was throughout the ranks, and having been seen by them only a handful of times, N could understand that he must be like a legendary pokemon to them. He smiled slightly, wondering if this man wanted to catch him. To lock him up in a small space to be used at leisure. Like Ghetsis had done.

"Thank you." N said. "I'm feeling better, now."

"That's good." The grunt relaxed noticeably. "What upset you, my Lord?"

Something strange was coming over N. It was almost like anger, a bitterness that wanted to lash out. A most foreign emotion, but sitting before this groveling human it came with a sense of superiority. He was a prince, and one day a hero. He deserved better than the cold treatment his father gave him.

"I feel unloved." N replied softly. "Do you love me? Will you at least tell me you do?"

Mouth falling open, the grunt got down on his knees. "Lord N, of course I love you! Every one of us does! Truly and completely!"

N smiled, but somehow he only felt more empty. It was not this stranger's love he wanted. It was not the same. This doting, groveling man was so different from his father. N had no desire to feel anything for the grunt, or to accept this strange, submissive love. Ghetsis was the only one whose touch he desired. But if Ghetsis had abandoned him in favor of others, then why should N hold onto the fantasy of being only for his father?

Even though a small voice in the back of his mind begged him to reconsider, N robotically slid out of his pants and underwear, draping his bare legs over each of the chair arms. "Show me." He commanded softly.

The grunt stared at him, a variety of emotions most of which N could not decipher passing over his reddening face. In the next moment, when he realized that his prince was serious, he leaned forward eagerly and began to kiss and lick every part of the boy he could reach.

N's body responded instantly to the gentle caress, but he felt nothing. It was not like the numbness that usually overtook him, and N could not understand his own emotionlessness. Nor did he wish to. This was not the result he had hoped for, but it didn't matter. Sliding his hand beneath the grunt's hood, N wound his fingers in the man's hair, guiding his head encouragingly.

And then Ghetsis walked in.

The grunt jumped back, babbling incoherently as he tried to explain himself. N let his legs slide back down to the seat and said nothing. A part of him had known that he would not be able to keep this a secret. A part of him had wanted his father to find them like this.

Face bare of emotion, Ghetsis looked from his son to the grunt, and then back. Then calmly striding over to them, his arm swung out and struck N across the face with enough force to tip the chair over and send the boy crashing to the floor.

"_You slut_." He hissed before pointing now at the cowering young man. "Kill him."

The Shadow Triad appeared and grabbed the grunt, dragging him off quickly as he wailed for mercy.

"It's not his fault." N said softly as he wiped blood away from his nose. "I told him to do it."

"I don't care what happened." Ghetsis retorted angrily. "You were touched by an unworthy peon. Death is a merciful punishment for such a disgrace. Now why did you do it."

N remained silent. He knew how reckless and stupid he was being, but the numbness in his heart prevented him from caring. The next thing he knew he was off the floor and slammed into the nearest wall, Ghetsis's hand around his neck. He could not breathe, nor struggle against the fierce grip squeezing the life from him, and his consciousness was fading fast.

"INSOLENT CHILD." Ghetsis was suddenly bellowing, his temper swinging as quickly as it always did. "How _dare_ you act so defiant! What could have possessed you that you would sneak off with some nameless wretch like a cheap whore!"

N tried to apologize, though he did not really feel sorry, but no air could move through his constricted throat. Tears of pain and reflex trickled down his bruised cheeks, and his feet searched for a support that was not there. Usually at this point Ghetsis would relent and allow N to breathe before repeating the process, but this time there was no relief, no mercy.

'He's going to kill me.' N thought with relief, and the last thing he saw before darkness overcame him was the seething expression on his father's face.

* * *

><p>When N woke up, he was alive and locked inside a small cell. For two days he was kept completely isolated, with little water and less food. Then the Triad came for him, and he was scrubbed clean and taken to a bedroom where his father sat waiting. Too exhausted and ashamed to be afraid, N stood silently before the man and waited.<p>

Ghetsis appraised him for a long moment. "Do you have anything to say?"

"I'm sorry." N whispered, his voice weak from two days of not saying a word.

"But that's not what I want to hear. Tell me why you would betray me."

N could not look up from the floor. "You hadn't come to me for a while. So I went looking for you. And then I saw you with a boy and I began to wonder if I was the only one." His words came out in an even faster rush than usual. "And then I was so upset.. I wanted.. I wanted attention. I wanted to not feel abandoned."

"So you purposely betrayed me with such impure emotions as jealousy?"

A surge of desperation made N finally meet his father's eyes. "_Am _I the only one? As your prince, you should only touch me! Why must I be the one loyal to you?"

Ghetsis narrowed his eye. "Because no one else is worthy of touching you. As your sire, only I have the privilege of using your body. And as for any lovers I might have.. no, there are none. You are more than enough to satisfy me, at least in that respect."

N blinked rapidly as he felt himself relax with a deep relief. Tears welled up in his eyes, and he quickly looked back down. "I..."

To his amazement, Ghetsis reached out and pulled N into his arms. "Were you really so distressed by the thought of another in my bed?"

Overwhelmed with emotion, N could only nod.

"You must not doubt my devotion, N. Why would I ever desire to touch someone lesser than you? Quell your fears." Pulling back from the embrace, Ghetsis smiled at his son, and then leaned down to kiss him.

Starved for the gentle attentions he was so unused to, N immediately pressed back, and eagerly opening his mouth, he welcomed Ghetsis's tongue in to rub against his own. Soon his clothes were falling to the floor, and N stepped closer, needing more. He wanted this. He wanted his father to take him, to be inside him. He could almost believe that it wouldn't hurt this time...

Ghetsis broke the kiss and watched the boy pant for a moment, his eyes half-lidded and lips swollen. "You look beautiful." He said, running fingers through his son's soft green locks. "So for tonight, I shall refrain from ruining your sweet face."

Before the words could sink into N's need-dazed mind, Ghetsis suddenly stood, the hand in his hair turned into a wrenching grip. N cried out as he was dragged over to the bed and thrown onto it, everything happening too fast for him to react. But as he watched Ghetsis quickly disrobe, fear twisted his stomach into knots.

"..Daddy..?" He whimpered as his father climbed onto the bed with him, both now nude.

"Did you really think that I would forgive you so easily? Did you expect to not even be punished? Your sinfulness has gone too far."

N cringed, tears filling his eyes. "I'm sorr—" A sharp slap silenced him quickly.

"Be silent. I do not want hear any apology from you. Because of your lust and envy, a man has _died_, N. Do you feel no remorse? What kind of king, what kind of _hero_, do you expect to be with such little regard for anyone other than yourself?" In fury, Ghetsis reached out and pressed his hand around N's mouth hard enough to drive him into a deep indentation in the bed. "You were perfect, N! A doll of unequaled perfection, crafted by my own hands, from my own body! And yet you rot and fade as though made of straw! Had your impudent mother not been killed by your miserable birth, I would have already disposed of you and made another!"

By this time, the prince's body was wracked with muffled sobs, his legs thrashing as he struggled to push away Ghetsis's arm. Snarling at the feeble attempt, Ghetsis slammed his fist into the child's stomach and ribs until he was out of breath and his son lay half-conscious beneath him.

Leaning back, Ghetsis watched dark bruises swell across porcelain skin and felt a pulse of desire stir in him. Sliding his hand between N's limp legs, he fondled the boy until a tiny whimper joined his wheezing breaths and he felt a certain part of his son's anatomy begin to harden.

"Your punishment will be long, and harsh." Ghetsis murmured slowly, fingertips toying with N's entrance. "And when it's over, you won't be able to walk, or talk, or sit up straight for days. I'll beat you until your body is so bloody and bruised you will forget ever having this pale complexion. All to teach you. That you are _mine_, that you must be _perfect_. Whatever I have to do, I will expel these sinful feelings from your mind, even if it means taking you apart and reassembling you as a heartless puppet."

N gave no response, but through the pain on his tear-streaked face, there was a hopelessness that gave Ghetsis pause. It was not the kind of despair that he adored, but a numb, almost uncaring sort of look. He did not like it. He wanted fear, not this dull submission. What did he have to do to achieve the desired result?

Considering this for a long moment, Ghetsis decided this was as fine a time as ever for an experiment. Reaching out, he took one of the velvet sashes holding the canopy bed's curtains back and tied it around N's head as a blindfold.

"Do not move." He instructed the boy, who whimpered uncertainly.

Slowly, taking his time, Ghetsis traced his fingers over his son's body. Feeling his fragile bones, the raised flesh of scars and bruises, and the sweat beginning to bead on his soft skin. There was a tremor in him now, and he was biting his lip as the loss of sight heightened his other senses and filled him with fear.

Perfect.

Pulling away, Ghetsis watched predatorily as N squirmed, not knowing where and how he would be touched next. It was much more arousing than the Sage had expected, just seeing the boy's trepidation.

Taking a candle from the bedside stand, Ghetsis casually dripped the melted wax onto N's stomach without warning. The child yelped as his bruised skin was scalded, and then began to cry quietly.

_Yes, yes, yes._

Delighting in the look of the red wax on his son's defenseless body, Ghetsis let his free hand slide down his own chest and wrapped his fingers around his cock. With leisurely strokes he brought himself to full hardness, and then kept climbing. Even just like this, just watching N's torment, it was enough to make him short of breath as pleasure heated his blood.

Rubbing the head of his cock roughly, he brought the candle tip down to singe N's arm with the flame, just to hear him scream. The boy was now terrified, but he continued to obey his father's command to stay put. His fingers clutched the pillow beneath his head, and the thick cloth covering his eyes was already growing damp with tears.

"Please, stop..!" He begged as he felt the painfully close flame travel up and down his thigh. "I-I can't.. No more!"

"I told you to be silent." Ghetsis snarled, putting the candle back and leaning over N's small form. His hand picked up speed.

N bit down on his trembling lower lip until it bled. He could feel the heat of his father above him, and hear his groans and the sound of him pumping his cock. Then a mouth descended on his chest, tongue prodding his nipple to hardness before it was pinched between sharp teeth.

He was unable to hold in his cries as rough bites moved across his chest, leaving behind bruises and deep grooves in his hypersensitized skin. Even though he was terrified and in pain, arousal raced through his blood. After so long, his father was paying attention to him again. A part of him felt truly happy, but it was so hard to cling to.

Ghetsis hummed, satisfied with the marks now gracing his son's heaving chest. Though his lust protested, he ceased the motions of his hand and sat back. He was close to orgasm, and it was much too soon to end their fun like this.

"On your knees."

Flinching, N forced his bruised body to roll over and prop himself up as instructed.

Hungrily Ghetsis took in his son's pale, inviting backside. Yes, soon he would partake of the only perfection the boy could offer him now. But not yet. Not just yet.

Refraining from touching that soft skin bared to him, Ghetsis decided to play with the child a bit more.

"Are you ready to end this, N?" He inquired with a grin.

Shuddering, the boy nodded.

"Do you want this?"

"Yes..."

"What is it that you want?"

This was a game N had played before. He knew the rules. "Your cock.."

"What about it?"

"Inside.."

"Answer clearly."

Breath hitching, N's hand crept between his legs, fingertips pressing against his entrance. "I want Daddy's cock inside me. Here." He bit out the words quickly, feeling a pang in his chest as he lied.

"Is that so..."

Ghetsis began stroking himself again as he watched one of those spindly fingers tremble and slide into his own body. A small sound escaped the child, his digit working in and out with growing confidence. Deeper, deeper.. N gasped when he found the place he was looking for, and in moments he had two fingers eagerly rubbing himself into a frenzy. As if forgetting where he was and what was happing around him, N whimpered with delight as his erection brushed against his arm. He spread his legs further apart and ungracefully wiggled his hips, seeking more friction.

It was truly a most arousing sight, and Ghetsis had to admit that his son's pleasured sounds were every bit as enticing as those of fear and pain. One hand still furiously pumping his cock, he squeezed the boy's backside with the other, grinning as N moaned in an uncharacteristically lewd manner. He could not dislike this side of N which was growing ever more bold the older he became. He would just have to make sure that he kept it on a very tight leash.

By this time Ghetsis could wait no longer. Moving forward, he shoved N's hand aside and pulled the boy's waist higher to align the small body with his.

Giving no protest, N held himself up as best as he could on his forearms and toes, face buried in the pillow. There was no used in avoiding the inevitable, and if nothing else he was thankful to have been given the chance to work himself up to almost, _almost_ wanting his father inside him. In this moment before the pain, he could tell himself that he did want it. That it would feel so good, that it would be love.

But then with a deep groan, Ghetsis pulled N back on his cock, forcing himself inside the barely accommodating passage, and he remembered the pain.

Screaming into the plush pillow, N's mind blanked out for a moment as the invasion sent agony shooting up his spine. It had been too long since the last time he was filled, and Ghetsis seemed determined to bury himself all the way. His legs locked up and would not move, paralyzed by the pain that consumed his back and entire lower half. His lungs could not fill with enough air to scream as he needed to. He was helpless.

Moaning loudly as stars filled his vision, Ghetsis pumped N's body back and forth, delighting in the power he held over the child. The muffled wails he could wrench from his ragged throat were like the sweetest music. N was now limp in his grasp, pliant and accepting as his inner muscles worked at his father's cock. Looking down at the pale boy, Ghetsis admired how small and fragile he looked, truly like a porcelain doll. It was a terrible shame he could not afford to break him, to shatter that milky glass skin and snap the bones beneath until there was nothing left of his beauty. He could only settle for ruining his mind in these uninhibited moments of heat and carnal lust.

Lifting one small leg over his arm, Ghetsis sank in even deeper. N clung to a pillow as though it would somehow protect him, screaming and sobbing into it piteously. Blood ran down his thighs, a hand roughly caressed his back, and fingers dug in between his bones as if wanting to take him apart.

"Are you imagining someone else fucking you, N?" Ghetsis grunted. "Would you rather it be another's cock inside you?" When he received no reply, he slapped the boy's backside hard enough to leave a red mark behind.

N yelped, but seemed not to have heard the original question. Growling in frustration, Ghetsis smack him again before yanking his face away from the pillow by his hair. "N! What is going on inside that defective head of yours? Answer me! Do you wish that common servant was the one fucking you now? Should I call in some more knaves to service your _needs_? Would that be to your liking?"

"No!" N cried desperately. "No, that's n-not–! AH! Daddy, _please_!"

Ripping off the blindfold, Ghetsis pulled out for a moment and flipped N onto his back before plunging back in. Pinning N's hands to the bed, he thrust viciously, looming over the small boy.

"Look at me, N! _I_ am the only one who can touch you! You are _mine_. My creation! Your only purpose is to fulfil your destiny –you should be grateful that I am so kind as to let you have the honor of serving me! Do not let your flawed concept of human emotions lead you astray from your goal. You must be _pure_ if you wish to become a hero!"

Pure. Yes. His self-sacrificing desire to make Ghetsis happy was pure. That was why he was given these lessons. He had to be perfect. Gasping for air around his tears and screams, N held onto his father's waist with his legs, lifting his hips higher so as to offer better access. As future king, as future hero, enduring this pain was his fate. Happiness was a luxury he would win for others by discarding any hope of it for himself. N understood this well. And in a way he could feel satisfied with this suffering. Because it was not meaningless.

Seeing the hopeless acceptance on his son's face, Ghetsis could not hold back a loud grunt as it caused maddening pleasure to race through his veins. Moments like this made him remember why he kept the boy believing in his "destiny". He wanted to see just how far he could twist him before there was nothing human left in his heart. The most entertaining of pet projects.

Finally letting go, Ghetsis thrust even harder as he came, N's back arching up off the bed as he was filled with seed. For a long moment, the Sage hung in ecstacy, ears graced with the pained gasps of his son, his cock squeezed so tightly by the boy's muscles. Pumping himself into N until he went soft, Ghetsis held onto the perfection as long as possible. At last upon pulling away, he wiped sweat from his brow and smirked at his son who lay shuddering and bleeding, looking just like a ruined and carelessly discarded doll.

"Move." He said shortly, pulling the sullied blankets down.

N slowly rolled onto his stomach and dragged himself to the edge of the bed. In obvious pain, he slid down to the floor and remained quiet as Ghetsis lay down to sleep for a while. Regardless of the circumstances, N was never allowed to stay close to his father unless necessary. Once the passion of the moment wore of, the boy was only an eyesore.

It was not much later that Ghetsis opened his eye again, still feeling the warm hum of sated pleasure in his body. Getting up, he made his way to the bathroom to take a shower, and found N already there.

The boy had apparently taken all this time to crawl over, his legs too weak to carry him, and was now sitting beneath the stream of hot water looking like a drowned kitten. At last noticing his father, N flinched back in fright.

Not entirely displeased with the hapless display, Ghetsis stepped into the shower as the child quickly scrambled aside. He looked so broken, eyes dead even though his face expressed fear. Because it was such an entertaining sight, Ghetsis decided the boy could stay while he showered.

As he let his hair soak in the warm water, the Sage watched his son shiver in the corner, curled up in a tight ball and covered with quickly cooling droplets. N made no complaint, nor any move at all, but his blank eyes watched the rivulets coming off his father's body and disappearing down the drain with a distant sort of longing. It was starting to irritate Ghetsis slightly.

"Stand up." He ordered.

N glanced at him for a moment before looking back down. Slowly uncurling, he tried to hold onto the tiled walls as he struggled to get his legs under him. When Ghetsis beckoned him over, N continued to use the wall for support until he was pulled into the stream of water.

Placing his hands on the boy's small shoulders, he was reminded again that even though he was tall for his age, he still had such a fragile figure. Had he needed N for any other task than an icon for his scheme, the boy would have been a complete failure, but as a "saint" and eventual "martyr", his delicate body was perfect. People held a natural love for frailty, they gravitated towards it with awe and an instinct to protect it.

Ghetsis did not do the things he did purely for his own pleasure. His brutal conditioning of N's mind had a specific purpose. The contradiction between purity and corruption in a strong mind and weak body created a natural enigmatic persona that was almost hypnotic. Anyone to meet N would find themselves swept away by him, lusting for him and idolizing him all at once.

But keeping the balance between his distorted innocence and worldliness was not as easy as Ghetsis had hoped. He would have to be more careful if he was to perfect this experiment. He only had one chance. The child had to believe that he was loved no matter what, but at the same time needed harsh discipline so as to not spoil his servitude.

Now that N was warming up again, Ghetsis returned to washing his hair. "Do you hate me?" He asked casually. "For the things I do to you?"

"No." N whispered.

"You love me?"

"Yes!" The answer came earnestly this time.

"Why the sudden change of tone?"

N shifted nervously. "It's not that I don't understand." He said. "When I thought you had betrayed me, I was so upset. I wanted to hurt you somehow. But I felt that way because I love you. Is that how it is for you, Father? Am I so terrible that I am the one driving you to hurt me?"

Looking back down at N, Ghetsis cupped the boy's face in his hands. "Yes. You understand now, don't you, N."

The boy nodded, tears welling up in his eyes. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so imperfect. I really do try to please you.."

"And one day you will be perfect. You must endure everything with innocence so that it is possible. And when that day comes, you will realize what this all means." A swell of pride and satisfaction tempted to emerge as a grin on Ghetsis's face, but he suppressed it. Despite his lingering flaws, his son would at least be able to fulfil his purpose like the deaf, dumb, and blind doll he was. And then he _would _realize.

That it had all been a charade.

Turning off the water, Ghetsis left the shower and dried himself off as N gingerly did the same. Once they were both dressed, N was about to return to his room when Ghetsis stopped him.

"Wait." He said to the boy. "Your punishment is not over yet. Now come."

N stared after his father for a few beats before lowering his head and following him down to the dungeons. Though he was promised eventual freedom, it felt as though these days would never end.


End file.
